Sunday, June 12, 2005

show and tell

Of course the worst thing about local agricultural shows is the queueing. Alley and Snicket decided they wanted to go on the Mega Slide of Death as well as the trampolines. Five minutes on each cost us over an hour of queueing alongside every chav in Yorkshire, as well as the traditional arm and a leg.

By the way, I should issue a correction to yesterday's post. Those camping chairs have gone up... £5.99 each, £10.99 for two. Just keeping you up to speed.

These dos are hosted and attended by a mix of chavs, chavettes and farmer types, but the modest selection of kid's rides means that there are 'fair people' there. Where do you think they go in real life? Somewhere with no running water I'd imagine as they all appear to be caked with a patina of grime so thick you'd think they holidayed in Pompeii. At least they're keeping the boys at Golden Virginia in business.

Now, normally we walk across the fields to the show, but this year we reckoned Snicket wouldn't cope with the walk back after the excitement of the death-slide, some newly sheared sheep and a sweaty bag of pre-spun candy floss for £1.99. So. We took the car. It would have been a good idea except for the fact that the complex parking system was overseen by those pretend weekend policemen who are trained to run away from the first sign of bother and some army cadets. I'm pleased to say that the army teens were blessed with a good deal more common sense, communication skills and strategy when trying to clear a gridlocked field of angry motorists than the pseudo-police... better training I'd imagine. Plus they probably get to play with real guns.

Either way. It took an hour and a half to travel the half mile home.

We'll be there next year though. Oh yes.